"But now you must also rid yourselves of all such things as these: anger, rage, malice, slander, and filthy language from your lips .
Do not lie to each other, since you have taken off your old self with its practices"
(Colossians 3:8-9)
Lately I've noticed some issues with my character and it's been frustrating dealing with them. I know no-one's perfect, and God "knows my heart" but that isn't an excuse to ignore it or strive to correct them.
For someone reason I'm easily angered or irritated by the people closest to me, like my family. It's like my love for them is somewhat "conditional" well that's what it seems like from the way I act. If they don't respond the way in which I think they should or do something that I feel should be done (regardless of if I'm right or not) I get an attitude and eventually, if it prolong without redirection, I'll began to distance myself a little....I've done the same with a close friend...I've simply been lacking in the area of love yall...
So It's confession time! I've been judgmental, gossiping more frequently, and self-centered at times. I've noticed that that I've said some hurtful words when angry, rather in my mind or behind closed doors (I call these crazy Atlanta drivers an idiots every day!)
Sadly, that’s not all guys, remember when your mom would tell you "If you don't have nothin' nice to say about someone, then don't say it at all?" Well, let's just say slander has been my friend lately. Nothing on a large scale, but still subtle slander is still slander! (If your discussion about someone is not building their character than it can't be good) I need to be more careful with the conversations I have that I consider just "venting" or "sharing my opinion." Some things are just better left unsaid or just need to be taken directly to the Father just to be on the safe side.
"Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up
according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen."
(Ephesians 4:29)
This week I've been seeking the Lord in my quite time regarding the condition my heart. These flaws are impossible for me to fix on my own and to be honest I'm really annoyed with them. It's like I can't control them & they just pop out! I think it may be a heart issue.
"For out of the heart come evil thoughts--murder, adultery, sexual immorality, theft, false testimony, slander."
(Matthew 15:19)
"Lord, I don't want to be this person, please give me a heart of flesh and remove my heart of stone toward others. I know that you've called me to love others as myself, and I know that this behavior can be detrimental to how they view who you are through me. Help transform me into the woman you've called me to be...Show me the areas of my heart that cause me to react this way, then Lord after you've shown me, help navigate me through the process of riding myself of the things that are unlike you. Heal and delver me from these character flaws."
I know that I'm imperfect but I genuinely want to be a woman of integrity and grace. I want to be slow to anger. I want to be able to take time to process situations from the other person's perspective and extend grace when they have wronged me just as the Father does for me. As an ambassador of Christ, it is important that I model His character towards others! I want to hold the needs of others above my own, and to truly be able to connect with them more intimately.
"Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me."
(Psalm 51:10)
It feels good to confess these things, & I know I'm not alone although the enemy wants me to think I am. I've notice that I've been self-sabotaging because of these flaws. I have been trying to control them on my own & failed. Fighting alone or in darkness has done nothing but cause me to grow more cold and feel more helpless.
"Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed.
The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective"
(James 5:16)
So I made the decision to reach out to my spiritual accountability partner for prayer and really take time with God about these heart issues. The enemy knows that if you keep your sins to yourself and in darkness it’s only a slim chance for you to overcome them. He won't win this battle!
#IWillLook&LiveLikeChrist.
I encourage you to confess your flaws to one another, someone you can trust & also to the Lord, He already knows anyway, & He is willing to help & heal you! Sometimes, we are our own worst enemy, don't allow the enemy to keep you bound when there is an option for freedom at your door.
"People who conceal their sins will not prosper, but if they confess and turn from them, they will receive mercy."
(Proverbs 28:13)
"If you need wisdom, ask our generous God, and he will give it to you.
He will not rebuke you for asking."
(James 1:5)
Grace & Peace Be With You,
Kaneisha