"A Mind is a terrible thing to waste"
-Unknown
The mind can learn & retain an immeasurable amount of information, create brilliant inventions, & even shape one's personality. But what happens when the mind is full of "waste" & it blurs truth, causes doubt, and distorts reality? Despite it's great abilities, if left untamed, your mind can become your enemy or a complete wasteland.
A JOURNEY THROUGH MY MIND...
I experience moments of depression sporadically, It usually occurs when something in my life is thrown off track. One negative thought caused by my current not so thrilling circumstance literally transforms the way I view everything about my life! With just one negative thought, I begin to speak negatively about myself and the lack of my abilities. I begin to live with no expectation of "good things happening" for me.
See, from my perspective, it seems like there is no way out of my current situation, so...in my mind I've blown it and my future is now over. Seems extreme right? Yeah I know! My thoughts take me from zero to infinity real quick! And if I'm not careful they lead me into a pit of despair.
I unconsciously become my own enemy! and you know who knows that...the Enemy Himself. He uses this weakness against me every chance he gets! I've been stuck in the same cycle for so long that I honestly started to accept that this would always be something I'd struggle to overcome. But the devil is a Liar!
"Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything.
Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done.
Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand.
His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus
(Philippians 4:6-7)
A GLIMPSE OF MY REALITY WHILE IN THE PIT OF DESPAIR....
"You don’t let me sleep. I am too distressed even to pray! I think of the good old days, long since ended, when my nights were filled with joyful songs. I search my soul and ponder the difference now. Has the Lord rejected me forever? Will he never again be kind to me? Is his unfailing love gone forever? Have his promises permanently failed? Has God forgotten to be gracious? Has he slammed the door on his compassion?
And I said, “This is my fate; the Most High has turned his hand against me.”
(Psalm 77:4-10)
WHEN THE SMOKE CLEARS & I'M REMINDED OF WHO GOD IS...
"But then I recall all you have done, O Lord; I remember your wonderful deeds of long ago. They are constantly in my thoughts. I cannot stop thinking about your mighty works.
O God, your ways are holy. Is there any god as mighty as you? You are the God of great wonders! You demonstrate your awesome power among the nations"
(Psalm 77:11-14)
DID YOU KNOW THAT GOD STILL SPEAKS THROUGH DREAMS?
I recently had a crazy dream! I was in a train station surrounded by men in the lobby who just kept watching me. While trying to print my ticket I selected the wrong city (which was ridiculous because I knew where I was going). So I had to reprint my boarding pass, but at this point I'm frustrated because my train is about to arrive. I finally get my ticket and check my bag. Then out of nowhere I misplaced my ticket and I go into a complete panic! I'm dumping out my purse and searching everywhere. The whole time everyone in the lobby is just watching me. As I'm looking for the ticket, I'm speaking negatively and getting emotional, "I just had it, OMG now I'm gonna miss my train, I might as well stop looking for it."
When I woke up I was really upset about what went down in my dream. I said "God what was that all about, that is so not even in my character to misplace a ticket and not be prepared for a trip in general." That’s when God spoke, He said, "This is what the enemy uses against you. He waits for you take the bait of temporary circumstances and if he can get you to believe the lie that they are permanent, then he just sits back and watches you self-destruct without having to lift a finger against you."
Wow! So I've been out here being straight free & easy entertainment for the enemy whenever I choose not to believe what God's word says over my circumstances! God told me that I needed to learn to fight with His Word, that I needed a battle plan. He said the enemy successfully blinds me of my true identity and once that’s complete I do the rest of the damage alone!
"For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal but mighty in God for pulling down strongholds,
casting down arguments and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God,
bringing every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ."
(2 Corinthians 10:4-5)
MY "LIGHT BULB" MOMENT!
While experiencing these moments of depression, I realize it may be fostered from a lack of anchoring God's truth in my heart. My identity in Christ is to easily shaken by circumstances. When I'm focused on my circumstances, I don't want to pray and ask God for anything, I begin to question everything, even my existence, and I sit down in the middle of a spiritual battle & fight myself instead of my real opponent. I turn away from God and His truth...and abide in my fears...instead of my only hope.
Eventually, I come out of it...but that’s the issue...I'm tired of being in and out of this...I want to be free from the enemy's grip, I don't want to be a free Netflix series for him anymore! So I'll be obedient and make a battle plan to fight against him with the word of God INSTEAD OF fighting myself! I challenge you to join me in creating a battle plan to fight against the enemy!! Remember, God is the source for our help but he wants you to use the tools He's already provided!
"Truly I tell you, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain,
'Move from here to there,' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you."
(Matthew 17:20)
Grace & Peace Be With You,
Kaneisha
~CLICK & LISTEN TO THE SONG BELOW!~